Today's the Day

Alright, today's the day, I'm finally going to start writing my blog...wooohooo! LOL.

My name is Erin, I am a wife and mother, step mother, daughter, sister and friend. I love theater and music and cooking. My husband is an amazing cook and has taught me alot. I'm sure there's lot's more to me, but I guess that will come out along the way.

Right now I am struggling as I deal with my teenage daughter. What's new huh? Age old question of how to deal with teens! My daughter, Audrey, is an awesome kid. We have always been increadibly close. She tells me everything (except about her schoolwork, which we will get to later). The first time she was kissed I knew the moment I saw her, and she knew I would know because that's just how we are. She is beautiful and thoughtful and I love every stinkin bit of her. Her teachers do too! I had a conference with them today and they agree that she is struggling and could easily be doing better. They want to nominate her for a leadership club at school so that she will have something special to be involved in. What a blessing that she has such great teachers!

So, what's going so wrong? School. It seems to always be a struggle for her. But it isn't because she has learning disabilities or other learning issues. I guess that's what is so frustrating. It's like she just stops trying. She has a ton of 0's right now. She isn't doing her homework. I feel like a failure because it seems I should have been checking on her more. I know, I know, it isn't REALLY my fault, but I feel somehow responsible for not prodding her more about what was going on. Ah, but prodding gets a very sassy, unreasonable Audrey. I ask her a question about school and she is railing at me, talking to me in a way she has never done. I know it is because she knows she has messed up and doesn't want to disappoint me, but she doesn't realize that. I have to say, it hurts.

I was near tears all day yesterday over it. What happened to our relationship? Will we go the way of so many Mom's and teen daughters and be at eachother's throats for the next four years? I hadn't even considered that we would struggle this way because I thought we were different. The shock of finding that we aren't is painful. It all happend so suddenly!

Thankfully I did some research yesterday and I found a site that had these really neat contracts for rules. It said that if you let your teen have a part in developing the rules they are more likely to respect and follow them. So, I sent her up to her room with the sheet and boy did she ever take it seriously. We were able to sit on the couch and talk through what we both thought was fair, then we both signed the contract. I am hoping is helps and I will let you know! By the end of the night, I had my sweet Audrey back. I know the "teen Audrey" will probably come and go, but as long as sometimes I get to see my sweet girl I will be able to make it through!