To Share or Not to Share....THAT is the question!

I overthink blogging. Blogging is supposed to be about the everyday things in life that have been going on.

I am first going to try to do that for the time I have had since the last blog. Lets seee, lets see, what's been going on. WELL, last night I took Audrey to Stony Point Ninth Grade Center for FRESHMAN ORIENTATION! Woohoo, High School, here we come! Seriously though, whoa, it's a pretty intense deal. I told her last night she has no idea how much harder school is going to be and how much work she is going to be in for. I'm a little scared.

Michael had another baseball tournament. Did really well. It was intense though, as always. Sunday I was completely wiped out! I can't blame that completely on baseball though. We had a really fun weekend hanging out with friends and staying up way too late both Friday and Saturday. Great times:).

Yesterday Jeff got a job offer, but it's kind of a bitter sweet thing. He was offered an assistant manager position with Mesa Rosa. Pros: It's a job, it's not fast food, he likes the place alot, IT'S A JOB! Cons: It's a $25,000 pay cut (ouch), it's assistant managing, oh did I mention the $25,000 pay cut? The deal is that they want to open another restaurant sometime in the near future and would be using him to GM that, so there would be a raise involved, which is good. I just don't know how long it would be until that actually happens. I suppose that is something we need a more solid answer to (and a promise of) before he makes his choice. I will keep you updated.

I am still looking. I have an interview today, but I'm not really sure if it's going to be something that's worth doing. It was set up by one of Jeff's friends, so we'll see. I was pretty proud of myself last week though. I had to take a test in order to apply to work for the 2010 census. Yes, the government wants to test you before they hire you. Oh and it's not any silly easy test either! Thankfully I took the practice test online first. I couldn't believe how much they tried to trick me on that thing!

I am not a confident test taker. I get REALLY nervous. Not to mention the fact that I haven't taken a test in oh, say five years. I was really nervous. More so when I got into the room and half the people there were RE-taking the test. Even a guy who has a masters! The test is twenty eight questions long and you get thirty minutes. I really had to fight my nerves as the time started because my mind was telling me to run screaming out the door. That's how nervous I was. But I was REALLY proud of myself because not only did I finish, but I only missed two questions! Still haven't gotten a call though:(. I guess if it's meant to be, it will be.

So, on to the meat of my thoughts. As I saw on my friend Todd's blog not too long ago, I am pondering the depth in which I bare my soul while blogging. I have already deleted a sensitive post because I worried about certain people seeing it. I am torn. I started this blog to bare my soul because writing is great therapy for me. It's a great way for me to work out how I feel. Much like talking things out, for me, sometimes I just talk or write with no idea of what it is that is really bothering me. Eventually though, through that, it comes out.

I love that people read my bogs and love the support with which you readers have blessed me. My worry? Those people that may also have access or knowledge of my blog that I really don't care to share ANY of my deepest feelings with. There are a few people out there who have hurt me so deeply in life that to share any of my feelings with, well, it's not appealing. On some level I want to throw caution to the wind and say I don't care. If they care enough to read, then maybe their hearts are not nearly as cold as I thought. On the other hand, I do not want to give them fuel. I don't want to give them any other way to hurt me. I hope this is making sense.

As I am writing though, at least right now, I think I will just keep baring my soul. I am, just as everyone else in this life, imperfect and flawed in many ways. I like to think that I have taken some of my biggest life challenges and I have become better for them. So, if you happen to be reading this, and you know who you are, you're missing out. You loved me once before, and I'm stronger and wiser now. I could be your friend. And I'd be a damn good one too.