Wow

I have to say that I was amazed at all the responses I have gotten from people about my last post. I really appreciate all the support! I've been so busy with my new job over the last few days that I haven't had time to make any decisions. Right now I feel like I need to just sit back a bit.

Things are going well with the new job. I was overwhelmed at first, which is normal. Each day has gotten a little better, so that is really good. I have to go to work soon, but hopefully tomorrow I will have time to really write.

New Job:)

Ok, I am officially REALLY excited! Jeff and I went to lunch there today. We took the computer and planned to talk about bills and budgeting as well as look at the menu and talk about my new job. The shop isn't much to look at from the front, but once you are inside, the place is really pretty. Once I am actually working, I will send pics for those of you who don't live local. It was really fun watching Jeff's face as we walked in and how surprised about how nice it is inside.

I have so many ideas! There are so many things that can be done to make this place even more successful and I can't wait to get started. And with Jeff not having a job at the moment, I am planning on having him work with me to develop things. How stupid would I be not to have the help from the man who has 20 years restaurant experience. And, we will get to work together. I think it will keep his mind occupied too.

Wooohooo, I have a job!!!!

Video Games & Rock Bands

Kids are hilarious. Amazingly I saw today that a video game can actually spark some great imagination:). Over the past few days the kids have been playing Guitar Hero World Tour at the neighbor's house. Yesterday after about an hour of playing the game, all the kids were suddenly in our garage making their own rock band. After about two hours of banging from the garage area, Michael and Natalee came in (stating that the band was only the two of them now since their manager Jeffrey had quit) with homemade flyer's stating, "The Rock is going on tonight, Saturday from 8:00 to 8:30, To: Mom, only 25 cents!"

After about another 15 minutes, Michael came in and said, "There's been a change in plans. The Rock is only going to be from 8:00 until 8:03, we couldn't think of any more songs.". Ha,ha,ha,ha!

When I looked out my front door, my enterprising kids had set up a drum set consisting of a cooler and two buckets and a microphone using a paint roller. Imagination ROCKS!

Emotion

Emotions are funny things and such a powerful part of life. When I applied for the job at Cafe Panini, I felt really great about the interview. I knew it was a awesome opportunity and I was assured that I pretty much had the job. At that point, I was elated. Time then dragged on with no word from the owners and I began to separate myself from that elation because it was beginning to seem that I was not going to get the job. I learned how to do that when I was a teenager. My mother an I often fought due to me being a teenager and her being very depressed. She would corner me in my room or in the car and gripe at me. I found that the way to defend myself was to separate myself from these episodes and ignore her instead of fighting back. Of course that also served to make her angrier.

Now I have to say that my Mom is a wonderful amazing person and I admire her greatly. That was a time in her life that I know she would do anything to change. She was in a deep dark depression and did the best she could at the time.

So, there are times in my life that I can take things and bury them, and strangely it is sometimes very hard for me to reach back in to those things that I have buried. So, when I FINALLY got the call that they had hired me, I felt strangely calm about it. Cautious is maybe how I felt? Of course as things have sunk in and I realize that yes, I really do have a job, I am absolutely thrilled. This job has a great potential for being something really amazing. Maybe some of what I am feeling has to do with Jeff. Even though I am so happy for this new opportunity, it's hard to enjoy when your husband is having such a hard time.

I want nothing more for Jeff than for him to find the job of his dreams. I want him not to have to feel pressured that he has to take the first thing that comes along just so that he can support his family. His sense of responsibility for us is so great that I fear he will take a job that will make him unhappy. He is such a wonderful man,and has healed me in so many ways from a really bad time in my life. He has shown me what love is truly about. More than anything, he has always believed in me and helped me to see that I can do so much more than I thought possible. I love this man more than words can truly express.

So, emotion, I watch him and I see his fear, his panic. It's hard to sit here feeling so helpless about how to help him. All I can do is love him and hope that is enough to see him through.

And then there is the emotion of being a Mom. Audrey had oral surgery today. As an adult, I knew that this would be easy and safe and she would come of out of it without a hitch (and she did). As a Mom, I worried about all the "what if's". I guess sometimes you just can't help that. And of course we haven't heard a word form her Dad. He knew how nervous she was, yet we haven't heard from him since he dropped them off the day after Christmas. The first person she wanted to call on the way home was her Dad, but his phone was turned off. I hate that my kids are growing up thinking that's how a Dad should act. And once again, I am thankful that they have Jeff in their lives to show them that isn't how a man treats his children.

Emotion....

Christmas, Family, Job Hunt & Secret Santa

Wow, we have certainly been busy and there is so much to tell. First off let me get the stinky news out of the way. Jeff and I are both still without jobs and my unemployment checks have been delayed due to red tape. I will get them, but not until after the first of the year. I got a call from the recruiter Friday telling me that he had talked to the owner of the store I had the interview for before Christmas and the guy said he was going to hire me. It's been over a week though and he has not called, so I really don't know what to think at this point.



Jeff got through his last few days at Sparky's. I was pretty disappointed in the owner of Wildfire and Sparky's (Bill). After six years of working with Jeff he didn't even bother to say thanks or goodbye.I went and hung out there a good part of the past couple of days. One of the cool things that happened was that I ran into Pokey, the woman who's party I worked a few weeks ago and she booked me for her Valentines party and I get to do the cooking this time:). I'm really looking forward to that.



Christmas Eve we went to Jeff's brother's house and had a nice time and then on Christmas Day we cleaned the house like crazy and then went to Jeff's Dad's. My parent's got here on Christmas Day and we enjoyed a nice evening together.



The day after Christmas all the kids arrived home around noon (yay!!!!). My sister and her family headed our way from Arlington encountering several bad accidents along the way which made for a long day for them. Jeff and I worked making a big family dinner and our neighbors Tony and Michelle also joined us. After dinner we opened gifts.



Audrey had been asking for a phone for Christmas. It was all she wanted. I told her weeks ago that she needed to have a "B" in all of her classes in order to get this present. I was trying to give her some big incentive. She didn't quite make it, but had signifigantly improved her grades, so I decided to go ahead and let her have the phone. She did not think she was getting the phone, so I wrapped it up in the neighbor's Guitar Hero World Tour Box. Ha,ha,ha, she opened it and was obviously surprised, but did a good job hiding her disappointment. A further search in the box found a phone and she was thrilled:).

We had a wonderful time with family and friends over the next couple of days, but we got one surprise that was just the coolest thing! I went out to check the mail after not checking it for several days. There were the usual Christmas cards from our family and friends. All had return addresses on them except one. I opened it up to find a sweet Christmas card with a very nice message of support for Jeff and I. Also inside the card were two $100 visa gift cards. Signed Secret Santa. I was completely blown away. I promise that when I am able, I will pay it forward. Secret Santa, whoever you are, thank you, from the bottom of my heart!

Christmas Story

I hope my friend Todd doesn't mind, but I am re-posting here on my blog, his most recent blog entry. I thought it was really special.

"Christmas Spirit
Friday night I was out delivering pizzas, lost in the dark and looking for some semblance of address numbers on the houses as I passed. At the end of the street was a home brilliantly lit for the Christmas season. Santa Claus stood in his sleigh on the grassy front lawn, surrounded by blow up snowmen, snow-globes and a barrage of other holiday lawn decor. This was the house. As I opened the car door and grabbed 2 steamy pizzas and a box of greasy hot-wings, Mannheim Steamroller wafted gently from hidden speakers. As I rang the doorbell, Jingle Bells started playing in tinny door-chime fashion as I waited on the front stoop. The dull glow of thousands of blue-tinted LED Christmas lights illuminated the receipt for $31.95. My wife and I usually decorate our house with Christmas lights, but a fire last August destroyed all of our exterior lights. Being on a tight budget, we decided to buy a tree this year and forgo exterior decor until Christmas 2009. We had heard about the new LED Christmas lights, so I asked the homeowner how he liked them. We chatted for a bit as he paid for his pizza, and I mentioned that our Christmas lights were destroyed last year. At this his eyes brightened and he said, "I have just the tip for you." He walked me out to the front of his garage where 5 large rubbermaid tubs sat, filled with Christmas lights. A lump rose in my throat as he started hauling them out to my car. They were filled to the brim with lights of all shapes and sizes. As we loaded them into the car, he asked only that I promise to put them up and wish my neighbors a merry Christmas. I was blown away. To him, they may have just been some extra lights that he wasn't using this year. To me they were a very generous gift of Christmas Spirit."

"The waiting...it's the hardest part"

Anytime you interview for a job and have to wait to hear from them it's hard. I feel like I nailed the interview, so whatever happens, I did my best. The recruiter called me yesterday to find out if I had heard anything and how the interview went after he left. I told him it went well and he was adamant that they should hire me...lol. I like it that he is fighting for me:). I am sure too, that since yesterday was a Sunday, they didn't want to call my references on the weekend. I am hoping I will hear something today. Jeff has an interview with Rudy's today, so send your good thoughts this way! They have a very strict 45 hour work week, and wow, that would be just awesome for him.

Speaking of waiting....I still have not recieved my first unemployment check. I am supposed to call in every two weeks, which I did, two weeks ago tomorrow, and nothing. It is near impossible to reach someone at the unemployment claims department. I have been waiting to get a return call for a week now. They called once and I missed the call, so then I had to start the process of reaching them all over again. I feel badly for these people because with unemployment being so high, I know they are overworked. But when you have $50 in your bank account and are really counting on that unemployment check...well...it's scary.

On a lighter note, we are dogsitting for one of Audrey's teachers that lives in our neighborhood. Kisses is a very sweet little lhasa apsa (I have no idea if I spelled that right...I could look it up...but nah). My bonus daughter Natalee LOVES animals and really wanted to bring Kisses home to hang with us at our house. Well, we brought Kisses home and it threw the rest of the animals into freak out mode. I don't think Kisses had ever seen a cat before and neither of my cats took kindly to haveing a little hyper dog running around. My sweet old dog Buddy just looked at us like "really?". Kisses spent the night and did pretty well, but the cats were still freaking this morning, so I thought it best to take Kisses home for some relief. Buddy doesn't seem to be fe feeling very well anyway and woudln't eat tis morning. I wonder if he thought this dog was here to stay. Poor guy.

Anyway, no news as of yet, but when I know something I will pass it along:)

I just had to add a really funny story or quote from my neighbor's son Justin. I was reading my friend Marsha's blog and she always tells these funny stories about her son and it made me think of Saturday night with Justin. Tony and Michelle (my awesome neighbors) had a Christmas party to go to, so I offered to watch Justin. Justin is five and in kindergarten and says hilarious things all the time as kindergartners do. I took him out to dinner and he told me he had to go to the bathroom. He was back really quickly and I said, "wow, that was fast!". He said, "Yeah, I'm a fast pee-er". Hilarious!